Sweat Lodge

My AC is out. It’s 3:30 and the temp in my house is 86 degrees. I’m sweating just sitting. We can’t sleep, can’t cook, or even be civil to one another because of the heat. Oh, dear God, the heat. Since I spent all of my summer fun money on carpet cleaning, carpenter bees, eye glasses, and a dog, I’ve decided to use my house as a sweat lodge. I plan to charge $10 for anyone who wants to sweat a pound or two off today. I guarantee quick weight loss - fewer than 15 min. If you are short on time, I will be happy to have you sweep up dog hair and you should be less a pound in five minutes - seven minutes top.

Misery loves company. Ready. Set. Sweat.

Your Calculations are Off

Last fall I noticed while driving at night the street signs appeared blurry. This spring I had a hard time identifying my own son on the soccer field. So I decided I might need to pick up a pair of glasses - just so I can see things in the distance more clearly. I went to my appointment today and the newly graduated doctor told me my eyesight was so poor, I am barely able to drive without glasses. Then he proceeded to tell me that my ability to see close up was compromised. He said since I’ve “turned 20 years old twice” I can be expected to have bad eye sight. It comes with “old age.” This was not something I didn’t already know. However, I was floored when he suggested I invest in a pair of bifocals! I told him he needed to recalculate his numbers and get back with me.

Bifocals at 44. 

He then tried to explain to me what bifocals were as if my mental capacity had been compromised as well! I took the Rx for distance and wished him a good day. 

Now I better get those new glasses before June 20 so I can clearly see the Regional games in North Carolina.

Summer of My Dreams

I’ve been dreaming of summer for months. This is how my first week went.

1. The AC went out three days ago. We have temps of 90 plus outside and temps of 80 inside. I feel like I’m at my mom’s.

2. Evan has an ingrown toenail again. He does self- surgery on the toe every 2-3 days in a vain attempt to stop the bleeding and swelling. We’ve waited five weeks for an appointment and it’s finally almost here.

3. We have an infestation of carpenter bees in our brand new pergola. Now we must pay for someone to treat the wood.

4. Did I mention we have a broken dog?

5. Keagan spilled a strawberry smoothie on the carpet. Then told me about it twelve hours later. A carpet cleaning company will be here Tuesday.

6. It’s travel soccer tryout season and the angst of awaiting a call, being told one thing, and then being told another caused more drama that I care to have in my life.

7. Thursday night Evan was in a wreck and had to be “saved” by his soccer coach. He has a jammed finger to go along with that jacked up toe. 

Clearly not the summer of my dreams. It almost makes me want to return to my class of trouble. Almost.

Ryker

This is Ryker last Thursday night. Less than 24 hours later he was hit by a car when he ran out the front door. The boys were beside themselves with grief and guilt. We were told the injuries to his chest cavity were so great he probably wouldn’t survive the night without someone monitoring the internal bleeding. Wes took him to Nashville to see an emergency vet. He was able to stabilize Ryker. On Saturday the doctor told us the swelling would continue and that Ryker would have even a harder time making it through another day. When we visited on Saturday, Ryker did not recognize us. The pain meds were coursing through his veins and he barely had the energy to hold his head up. Ryker defied the odds and survived the trauma with the swelling and bleeding. We visited on Sunday and his tail wagged when he saw us. He was clearly doing much better. On Monday the doctor inserted a pin/plate to rebuild his broken femur. Tuesday night he came home.

Less than a week after surgery and he’s walking again. He even tried to chase the cat today. I never imagined I would spend my summer convalescing a dog. But here I am...

Vacation in December will be spent at Edgewater Lane. 😂

Glass Blowing

I have a friend who doesn’t understand spending hours in the car driving to and from soccer training. She spends her free time touring, shopping, and exploring. I knew when I found a glass blowing workshop she would be the first to join me. Today we blew glass to make ornaments.

I will be the first to suggest you learn to blow glass in a month where the temperature is not already hotter-than-Hades. 

I also suggest you choose a gallery for your lessons as opposed to a farm with biting flies and a parking lot that looks like this. 

And be sure to take a friend because laughing sweetens the adventure! We are making candles next month.

Sons of Pitches

It’s summer time and Keagan’s 3v3 team spent their first free weekend playing soccer. We were hoping to spend Saturday playing in the state tourney, but our loss last weekend against Knoxville, eliminated our team. Sons of Pitches played in Clarksville instead.

Evan is the coach. He remained calm on the field, offered a few words of advice to the boys, encouraged from the sidelines, and substituted the players so they all got equal playing time.  (I know that last part was hard for him.) He argued with the ref’s bad calls AFTER the game and even got the final score of game two changed in our favor when he was able to articulate why she was wrong.

We won game one. Lost game two. Tied game three. And lost in the third place game. We finished in fourth even after playing up. Not bad, but not great. Keagan had a goal in game three - this is his shot. 

Evan’s coaching contract has been extended to July. Let’s see if he can come up with a plan for winning by then. 

Summer Break

Ahhhh! Finally!! After teaching 21 years, this is surely the most celebrated last day of school ever. Never have I had a more challenging class or a group of kids that made me question my chosen profession. I cried on my way to work the entire first quarter. I contemplated, several days in the second quarter, not taking my exit to Fort Campbell and just continuing west on I-24. There’s nothing north of post except Paducah and a quilt museum, and believe me when I say there were days when quilt making seemed much more fun than my class of trouble. And now it’s the day I’ve been awaiting since September. It’s my first day of summer break, and I’m spending it doing everything I like but soccer.

 Tonight I attended an art class where we made serving trays out of whiskey barrel lids. What says Tennessee more than Jack Daniels? Not a whole lot. 

I think it’s just beautiful!

Next week Tina and I are glass blowing!